theregoesdave

As of late Valleywag readers have been reading an onslaught of stories about the so-called “renowned tech critic” Julia Allison even being so brazen as to call her “Mossberg-esque.” I hate to be a wet blanket on the journalist love-fest being driven by this Gawker property, but I’m afraid that I have to call bulls#it on this one fellas. Let’s take a look at Julia’s blossoming career and I think we’ll see the tail wagging the dog here:

“Julia Allison is the Editor-at-Large for Star magazine and a weekly columnist in Time Out New York. She has written for Cosmopolitan, Maxim, New York, Teen Vogue, Seventeen, Capitol File, The Huffington Post and Men’s Health. Her columns also appear on Yahoo.com’s homepage weekly. From Fall 2005 until Spring 2007, she wrote both a weekly column in the Manhattan newspaper AM New York and a monthly column in COED magazine.

Julia does on-air commentary daily on various networks, including Fox, CNN, MSNBC, E! Entertainment, FoxNews, CBS, NBC, CourtTV, Fox Business, Fuse and others. She’s been a talking head on Access Hollywood, Showbiz Tonight, Hannity & Colmes, Glenn Beck, Your World with Neil Cavuto, Montel Williams, Fox&Friends, The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch, FoxNews’ Lips&Ears, G4’s Attack of the Show, CourtTV’s Hollywood Heat, CBS’s Early Show and Fox 5 New York’s nightly news. She is a regular on the new Fox Business Network shows, Happy Hour and America’s Scoreboard, and did the weekly Relationship 101 segment on Fox’s Morning Show with Mike & Juliet for much of 2007.”

Taken from http://www.juliaallison.com/bio.html

The first thing that would be evident to anyone in the technical field is the litany of Hollywood celebrity publications that she’s either written for, edited, or appeared on. You’ll also notice that she began her career as a legislative correspondent on Capitol Hill. She also may or may not have been involved in a political scandal. So what might lure someone into thinking that Julia Allison is a Tech Critic?

Could it be her weekly column on Yahoo!? Further inspection will uncover the fact that this is a dating column for Yahoo personals, with geek-stimulating titles such as, “Dropping Pounds Along With an Ex,” “Dating a Political Hotshot,” and my personal favorite, “Letting It All Hang Out on Halloween.” Maybe her loose association with the rise of minimalist blogging site Tumblr? Even Valleywag doesn’t buy that. In fact, they went so far as to call her a “New York Nobody” as recently as late October. Right before she became weekly fodder in their tech gossip teacup. I wonder what changed Valleywag contributor Nicholas Carlson‘s view on Julia?

Her only viable connection to the Internet Industry at large seems to be a shortlived, but very public affair with Jakob Lodwick co-founder of Vimeo and Tumblr investor. The ill-fated blog cataloging their trainwreck of an affair, JakobandJulia.com, was likely her furthest foray into the depths of technology journalism.

Please don’t get me wrong here. I believe that Julia has the potential to be a goliath in the Technology market. If not for her vast experience with technology, then because she’s an actual journalist and really hot in that cute, approachable way. Plus her well-circulate belief that Nerds make the best lovers will have her geeky audience hanging on her every word.

We know that we are.

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